December 17--not even winter yet--and I'm digging out of several inches of snow, hacking away at an inch of ice below that, and bracing for a good ol' fashioned ice storm tomorrow (and hoping I have enough cardboard boxes and scrap firewood to burn in case the power goes out and so does the pilot light). Ah, Chicago. (Tell me again why I left Seattle 30 years ago.....). But there is really no refuge from the cold other than S. Florida (which has gotten down below freezing a couple of times when I visited). It's even snowing--and sticking--in Las Vegas and New Orleans. Thank goodness for eBay, Amazon, Peapod, etc.--on the one hand, you miss out on the festive experience of Yule-bedecked department stores, pungent bayberry potpourri, lines of little kids waiting to pose for overpriced pictures with Santa, and Christmas Muzak wafting through the malls. On the other hand, you are spared the festive experience of Yule-bedecked department stores...... Moreover, there's no fighting over nonexistent parking spaces in icy slushy lots; yet your loved ones still get their presents in time (provided you remember to wrap them). Which leads me to present my Things I Don't Want for Christmas or Hanukkah List: 1. Fruitcake. Don't get me wrong, I like the stuff. But I'm still working on the one from 2004. 2. Cashmere socks. My sock drawer is the Bermuda Triangle for hosiery--and if I am going to lose various mates of socks, they might as well be cheap ones. 3. Cheese. See Fruitcake above (trust me, it's impossible to go through two pounds of cheddar before the mold sets in). 4. Cookbooks. I already have dozens I read and then whose recipes I ignore. 5. Handkerchiefs. I really relish the experience of sneezing into something and then having to wash, dry and iron it....NOT. 6. Perfume. It will only make me sneeze, and then I will have to reach for a handkerchief.... 7. Barack Obama's Senate seat. Trust me, you can't afford it. Rod Blagojevich told me so. Finally, I am going through severe Bar Show withdrawal. This year I had the biggest role I've had to date, the most fun playing it, made the most new friends, and watched it pass faster than it ever seemed before. Not performing any time in the near future except next Tuesday on the WDCB Folk Festival Christmas show on 90.9 FM (January is reserved for either recording, a knee replacement, or cataract surgery...and I'd vastly prefer recording; February will be spent performing and convening in and traveling to and from Kansas, Arkansas, Oklahoma, Missouri and Memphis). So Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, a brilliant light in the Solstice, and a joyous Festivus for the Restivus. (As to Kwanzaa and New Year, I'll blog again before then).